whatever

i'm happy for you and i'm happy for myself too (or not?) if people like you (who is reading this) know what i mean. thou shall move on or shall i?

i went to san franciso, and i thought it was new york

srsly, when i went to san francisco, i was insisting, YES! I AM NOW IN AMERICA!!!! and it feels like i'm in new york (based on movies/pictures of new york)

sorry lungs kung braggy or gimanol lang jud. but uggh whatever. every time i see photos like these below, it makes me wanna go back in san francisco, esp powell street!

went here, shopped here, and felt it was new york!

so far the largest and hugeeeeeessssssttt forever 21 place i've been to! 4-storey store! as in WOW o.0

kasi mas mura ang aldo sa labas?

insert vertigo here, srsly, nahilo ako.

feel na feel ko ang kalyeng ito.

*all photos are not mine, from Google, they belong to their photographers. haha

i don't have photos of me here, and i soooooo regret it. BB purely sucks at photos. if u know what i mean.

*quick post

march 2013 issues

i need a continuous dose of optimism na gagraduate ako sa March 2013. i have this problem for months now, i've been thinking if i'll be marching on march 25, 2013. my issue here is not about i have failing grades, but it is about my 200 hours manufacturing internship (which anyway, i gave up last summer because i went to america). i am not sure if i will have the chance to have it in dvo instead of manila. ipasok mo pa ang very wrong timing na 1-week REQUIRED absence sa last week ng october, how can i catch up with these 200 hrs internship and classes when at the same time 2nd semester will start on last week of october and has no duty days? anwyay, i'm on my half way of my specialization internship at san pedro hospital. i must stop this internship to give way for my manufacturing. gets mo? kasi ako, hindi ko rin gets kung tama pag-explain ko sa english. bahala ka.

hindi ako susuko, lalo na sa pharmaceutical jurisprudence and ethics and quality control subjects ko. sisiw lang kayo. siya nga pala, good bye to my cum laude dreams, see u in my day-dreams instead, for u will be buried forever. *cries* i think my hardships are not enough, i regret those days when i snoozed my alarm for 10 min more then snoozing it again for another 10 min then snoozing it all over again and forgetting that i should study my chapters of lessons early in the morning. i also regret those days when i've been daydreaming and daydreaming all over again instead of spending those hours in studying. i regret those days when i prefer to dress-up with so many clothes to try on, when i prefer to stalk in fb, when i prefer to watch movies or even when i prefer to type these words instead of studying for finals or revising our thesis paper. whatever it is, i will never ever regret that i enjoyed every minute of those regrets. gets mo? kung hindi, same same lang tayo. hirap iexplain eh, promise.

may 2012

hi blog, so as what i've said in my previous post, i'm gonna tell u what happened on my may 2012, this is also the continuation of click this,

ARRIVAL IN LAS VEGAS

i did not have any problem setting my feet in las vegas, i was not interviewed by any immigrant consul since my hawaii was my first territorial entry in America. the only problem i was having that time was how to contact my sister coz i'm gonna tell here i arrived already. luckily in the arrival section of McCarran airport, my bb detected a strong wifi connection, then i immediately told (through fb chat) my sister and bayaw that i am waiting already at the airport. i stepped my foot outside the airport, the first thing caught my attention was a line of limousines and a billboard/sign of limousine rates and of course, the cooler wind striking me. anyway, i arrived at exactly 11:58pm (something), almost midnight. i waited for 30 min, i was busy looking at people, the limousines and the not-so-high-buildings. 

anyway again, i was shocked  because i was expecting a very bonggacious night lights, but i only saw that typical city night lights, very ordinary. and sa wakas, dumating na rin yung bayaw ko, with my niece and nephew (danica and andre).

we were already at my sister's/their house after a 10-min ride. their house is huge, when i say huge, it's a typical mayaman-looking house or more like of a mansion in the philippines but it's a typical/average house of a commoner in america. and i realized that time how much work, perseverance and effort exerted by my sister. i'm just so proud of her. period. first thing in the morning, my sister woke me up (after her 9pm-6am duty) and we hugged and kissed, like what usual sisters do when they missed each other. we talked, gossiped, name it all the chikka. haha. we ate breakfast and sent my niece in her prep school. she's the only Asian/pinoy in class. she bragged her octopus thingy. her classmates were all white and i was having a hard time talking to them because...uhmm, dude, they have this very slang sleng tongue. haha

everyday was a routine, spent my day time cooking lunch, baby sitting andre, cleaning the house, facebooking, skype-ing, sleeping, exercising, wii-ing, watching movies yo gaba gaba, barney and the like. i usually go to bed very late (11pm-2am) and wake up at 8-10am.

LAAG

since my sister's and bayaw's day off were set on sundays, mondays and tuesdays, of course, that's the time of my "stroll around the sin city". we went to different HUGE and FAMOUS hotels and casinos, namely, Aria resort and Casino, Caesar's Palace, The Venetian, Belagio, Green Valley Ranch Resort and Casino, shopping outlets, night club (eg, Tao Club where paris hilton went clubbing years ago) (we did not go clubbing, i just took a photo of myself) and some place else, FOOD places! one time (mother's day), we went to this ugh-very-expensive-buffet-house, and ang bayad lang naman per person is enough to feed me for 2weeks! but it's okay, it's not my money anyway and minsan lang ito sa buhay ko. i did not have the chance of visiting mandalay bay and mgm grand because i don't know why. haha. and finally, on my last weekend stay there, i finally saww the bonggacious city night lights of las vegas strip, the brightest and the only visible area of earth seen in space. las vegas is indeed a sin city, 24 hours casino/gambling, numerous entertainments at streets anytime of the day and of course, countless tourists/casino people/gamblers. it's a very alive city and i loved it, less traffic, wide and clean high ways but i just hate it when the temperature rises to 40 C, hotter/warmer than the philippines. haha. to sum up my trip, here's a video i made 5 nights before i went to a new state, California.

june 2012 post, up next. keep updated bloggie lovie love! ew.
PS: SORRY LUNGS SA GRAMMAR. lisod mag-english.

sleeping problems

dear bloggie lovie love,
every night na lang, andami dami kong naiisip na gusto kong ishare, but when the time comes i open my laptop i usually open my facebook, yahoo, some random news articles, fashions blogs and whatsoever. i regret to do this everyday coz you know, sayang naman yung thoughts ko every night. siyempre gusto ko ring ishare yung mga daily activities, some shits i do in school, some coping mechanisms and again some stupid things i always do. since i put up this blog for my purpose of revisiting my memories and activities when a year ends, siguro naman pwede akong magsulat ng kahit ano I haven't shared enough for a long period of time na rin, isaisahin natin yung mga nangyari sa buhay ko na hindi ko nasulat o nahiya akong ishare dito (eh, kasi nga, public site ito, baka sakali namang may stalkers ako. haha)

the last time i shared my activities was last march pa, so let's start with April 2012

April 2012

april, as far as i can remember, was one of the busiest and most challenging month (so far) this 2012. why? as a tradition, my family sponsored the crowning of thorns "paso/karo" the parish church uses during Holy week, so siyempre, busy talaga sa mga flower arrangement and all. it was this time also na pumunta ako ng Manila to follow up my US visa case, maliit lang nakakaalam na kumuha ako ng 3 vaccines shots simultaneously, nag pa genital/vaginal exam (which was the most awkward physical test i did!) and name it you got it na tests sa st. lukes extension clinic, (medical exam was a requirement for visa applicants like me). kinabahan naman ako sa results ng xray ko, kung alam niyo lang yung kaba ko. eh kasi ganito yun, i have previous cases of right basal pneumonia, eh kasi naman, super weak ng lungs and immune system ko. but luckily, wala namang palya, okay lahat ng results. eto naman yun, yung love life ko sa panahong ito, "on-off" yung stage namin dito, eh kasi ako busy sa sa mga application files, siya naman na busy sa duty. grabe rin yung inis ko sa buwang ito, dito ko talaga narealize na may mga tao pala talagang okay lang sa umpisa, pa sweet-sweet pa, caring and all, then in just a blink, baliktad na. nagiging cold na sayo, walang pakialam, basta ganun. kasalanan ko na rin siguro, magkaaminan na, i realized in my first 2 relationships, sila ang effortful, naghahanap palagi ng paraan para makausap ka and ako naman yung effortless, halos hindi naappreciate yung ginawa nila, so i told myself in my next serious relationship, gusto ko, i exert force and effort na. but in this relationship, ako lang pala yung isang mag eefort nang todo, if u know what i mean, nag effort rin siya, oo, pero hindi ganun talaga siguro ka todo. eto yung sabi ko na challenging ang april, i always thought of us that time, and of course, my US dreams. ipasok natin ngayon yung interview ko sa US embassy. mga at least 1 wk before my interview, siyempre, ako, effortful talaga sa paghahanap ng outfit, so ayun, nakabili rin ako ng high waist mustard yellow pencil skirt and blue see-through long sleeves blouse and high-heeled black shoes, with all the formal bag. 6 am nakalagay sa notice of interview ko, 5:30am, andun na ako. ayon, tanaw na tanaw ko na ang manila bay at us embassy, ang haba-haba ng pila. pero ang ikinashock ko nang bongga ay ang effortless na pagdadamit ng ibang applicants. pwede naman pa lang mag tsinelas, mag pantalon at mag t-shirt! bwiset talaga, nadamage pa ang pera ko! pero choks lang, siyempre, habang rumarampa ako patungo sa pila, grabe naman kung makatitig ang mga tao sa akin, artista ako doon, eh kasi nga, ako na ata ang pinakaformal doon, with all the eye liner, lipstick, blush on and wag kalimutan ang newly rebonded long hair. hihi. naamaze ako sa automatic at super bigat na caution door sa loob, lahat automatic. 5 times ata akong ininterbyu, siyempre, english, hindi naman ata ako nagka wrong grammar, siyempre, super rin ang praktis ko bago ako dun sumabak. na shock na lang ako sa sinabi ng consul "ok, you're visa is approved!", hindi ko naman kasi inexpect na siya pala ay isang consul, ang kapal ko man, pero promise, super simple lang nga mga tanong, "what is your name?" halos. tama pala, ang dala ko lang sa loob, panyo, and files ko tsaka perang enough pangtaxi pauwi.  siyempre, kinabahan ako nang bongga, hello! i was in manila, and manila to me is so nakakahilo, but to the rescue ang super pogi kong kuya na naghintay sa labas ng ilang oras under the scorching heat of the sun, nakauwi na rin. after 1 wk, dun ko na receive yung passport and visa ko, umattend rin ako ng seminar "counseling for teens" (seminar that will help those children under 18y/o who will be migrating and staying for good, u know, para makaadjust) dun sa POEA (phil overseas enforcement agency), ako yung pinakamatanda sa lahat ng umattend, nashock naman sila when i said, i was from sultan kudarat. i spent the last week of april shopping, eating, sleeping, workout, spending time in bulacan, nakifiesta sa pampanga, Echanted kingdom with college friends, mall hopping and coffee with friends, luckily, that time, nagduduty sila sa mga manufacturing companies in nearby central luzon provinces. ayun.

sunod na yung may, june, july and august, imma sleep na. exams pa later.